Wednesday, December 25, 2013

How to Get Away With Murder

Admit it: On Christmas, there is always at least one person you wish you could kill without consequence.

Now, thanks to stand-your-ground laws and the-gun-owner-is-always-innocent policies, it's easy!

First, get a gun and learn how to use it.

Next, invite the person you want dead over to your house. When he/she shows up and knocks on the door, shoot him/her dead.

Then, tell the cops you thought he/she was a burglar and you were just defending yourself. Success!

Think Progress:

A Colorado Springs father fatally shot his teenage step-daughter Monday, saying he thought she was a burglar. Prior to the incident, police received a call about a burglary in progress. But when they got there, they found the 14-year-old with a gunshot wound. She was taken to the hospital and died soon after, according to CBS Denver.

The incident is the latest tragedy involving the use of deadly force to protect the home. And it is one of several incidents in which a parent has killed their own child after they mistook them for a burglar. Last September a Connecticut teacher shot and killed his 15-year-old son after his neighbor called to say she thought she saw a robber in the front yard. Just a few weeks after that, a retired Chicago police officer shot and killed his 48-year-old son after he came in the back door late one night. And an off-duty police officer killed his son last July while the two were on vacation in upstate New York, after he told police he believed him to be an intruder.

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