Way Too Much Fun With Gas Prices

Wonkette posted about gas prices, and commenters anniegetyerfun and SayItWithWookies got carried away.

anniegetyerfun

$3.76! Luxury! It costs a minimum of $4 a gallon in the Seattle area, and we have to refine it ourselves, using nothing but bendy straws and a filter from a goldfish tank.

SayItWithWookies

Bendy straws? Luxury! Here we use two rusty tomato cans and a sterno, and we do it by a light powered by three potatoes strung together. And we like it that way.

anniegetyerfun

You can afford string for your potatoes? We have to shave our heads and weave our own rope on a loom constructed from the rusty car parts from the autos we can no longer afford to drive. But do we complain? No.

SayItWithWookies

You have a loom? Oh, pardon me you highness -- when we need twine we make it by rubbing cat hair between our palms, in spite of our terrible allergies and the constant pain from when the cat scratches us because we're shaving it with a rusty Bic disposable. But we're a proud people and that's how it's always been done.

anniegetyerfun

Oh, I didn't realize that you lived in an area where keeping pets was the norm. That must be nice. We ate all of our cats last winter, of course, as well as our rusty Bic razors. We really had to chew to get those down, but it was filling, and we gave thanks, like we were taught, for our bounty.

SayItWithWookies

Well we only keep the cats because they prevent the rats from following us home from the dump where we forage for banana peels and okra stems for our Sunday dinner. Ever since little Billy's nose was eaten off by the rats one night we've had to keep them. Of course they're feral, and possibly rabid, but we wouldn't have it any other way.

It's probably still going on ....