Another USA "Dummy Map"

They all look the same: the maps coloring the states according to lack of education, poverty, obesity, freakazoid control, internet porn use, etc. Southeastern states stand out on every one, usually in deep crimson. Civilization and rationality prevail in the northeast and far west, soothing in deep blue.

No surprise that the Miss USA pageant (that still exists? sheesh) produces a similar map. From Beeryblog:

This year’s Miss USA contestants were asked whether evolution should be taught in schools.

Nicole Belle at Crooks and Liars posted a piece about the inanity of their answers, noting that most of the contestants considered evolution a “theory” that was on par with the creation myth in the Book of Genesis.

But (apparently with way too much time on my hands) I decided to dig deeper. I took notes on the answers of every one of the contestants to see whether there was more to learn here than just that the majority of the contestants saw evolution science and the creation myth as deserving of equal weight. After all, each one of these contestants had to be crowned Miss [Fill in name of state] to get to the Miss USA pageant.

I theorized that contestants in certain states, to win their state titles, would have had to master the art of fake-Jesus code; how could one become “Miss Alabama,” for example, without prattling on about the Old Testament somewhere along the way?
My findings were startling. I’ll start with a map, which you might confuse with an electoral map representing states solidly Democratic, leaning Democratic, solidly Republican, or leaning Republican in a typical election year. Take a look at this map (Louisiana is not colored in because the contestant from that state had no idea what the question was about, so her answer didn’t count):



- The dark blue states sent contestants to the Miss USA pageant who solidly supported teaching evolution in schools.

- The light blue states sent contestants to the Miss USA pageant who indicated support for teaching evolution but only with some reservations or confusion.

- The pink states sent contestants to the Miss USA pageant who thought that evolution and creationism (or some other “theory” or “perspective” or “point of view”) should be taught side-by-side as equally plausible possibilities.

- The dark red states sent contestants to the Miss USA pageant who either said evolution should not be taught, strongly suggested that it should not be taught, or said that even if it should be taught, they themselves did not “believe in” evolution.

It seems eerie how well a beauty pageant reflects the state of American electoral geography. Had I been shown this map without knowing what it represented, I would have bet my last dollar that it was somebody’s projection about how things might pan out for Brack Obama in 2012. But no; it’s actually a map representing the relative idiocy of Miss USA contestants in 2011.

Read all 50 answers, but here are three that caught my eye:

Kentucky: It’s not a good “topic for school subjects” because there are just too many different views and beliefs about it.

Funny. When I was in school, there were more "different views and beliefs" about algebra (specifically, its relevance to real life) than there were about evolution.

Florida: Yes, it should be taught in schools.

You hear that, Kentucky? Freakazoid, conservatard, Rick-Scott-electing Florida sent a member of the realtiy-based community to the pageant.

New Mexico: Yes, because it’s science.

The heavily hispanic, heavily catholic State of Enchantment gets it right.