Hands Off Twain, You Illiterate Motherfuckers

One of the many reasons freakazoids, rethuglicans and other conservatards are successful in implementing outrageous anti-American policies and actions is that their proposals are so over-the-top insane that liberals are left flabbergasted and speechless with shock.

Like ripping the living heart right out of the Greatest American Novel ever written.

Bon The Geek is not intimidated:

A new edition of Huckleberry Finn is about to be released. This scrubbed version will have no instances of the "N" word, and the word "Injun" is also replaced throughout Twain's novel. Twain expert Alan Gribben insists he is not trying to censor classic literature, but to update. Epic fail. Classic literature does not need to be updated, that is what makes it classic.

Let's look at some of our classics. To Kill A Mockingbird shows us an ugly time in the South, and a glimpse of how rural life really was for millions. Steinbeck's Of Mice And Men is brutal and painful, and the characters are not the least bit respectful towards the mentally handicapped. Speaking of mentally handicapped, One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest was miles from politically correct. It is still one of the best stories I've ever read, mainly for its ability to make my heart hurt at the injustice. Don't even get me started on Gone With The Wind. We are not parrots, the purpose of reading is to use the mind and expand our ideas. Most will not mindlessly flinch at the use of an offensive word, but the anger or outrage we may feel at what once passed for common can inspire us, and help us realize the roots of the words we speak and the culture we came from. Good art, no matter the medium, inspires thought and stirs our emotions. And the person who decides what goes into that art is the artist himself.

Nobody has the right to alter someone's work in this manner. Nobody has the right to decide what we read. This is no more appropriate than if we try to scrub Snoop Dogg's lyrics for our great-grandchildren. If you do not want to be exposed, then exercise your rights to choose what you read. Do not exercise your rights on the behalf of others, who are free to feel differently. This isn't about the N word, folks. It is about respecting art, context, history and the lives that people lived for good and for bad. If Gribben feels there should be a lighter version of this story, then perhaps he should write one. What he should not do is lead a campaign to alter the art that someone else worked over, and put their heart and best into, and decide what Twain should have said.

Twain, who spent a lot of words ridiculing the know-nothing puritans of his own time, would appreciate the irony.