No Taxpayer Rescues for Escaping Freakazoids

These people left this country because they hate the government, but are so incompetent they have to be brought back home at taxpayer expense by that same government.

No. Just No.

You think this country's government is so terrible because of teh gheys and teh bortions and teh wimmins that you have to escape, then fuck you.

You demand a country where your invisible sky wizard is in charge, then get your invisible sky wizard to rescue your treasonous ass.

No secular tax dollars for you.

Greg Moore, AP:

A northern Arizona family that was lost at sea for weeks in an ill-fated attempt to leave the U.S. over what they consider government interference in religion will fly back home Sunday.
Hannah Gastonguay, 26, said Saturday that she and her husband “decided to take a leap of faith and see where God led us” when they took their two small children and her father-in-law and set sail from San Diego for the tiny island nation of Kiribati in May.

But just weeks into their journey, the Gastonguays hit a series of storms that damaged their small boat, leaving them adrift for weeks, unable to make progress. They were eventually picked up by a Venezuelan fishing vessel, transferred to a Japanese cargo ship and taken to Chile where they are resting in a hotel in the port city of San Antonio.

Their flights home were arranged by U.S. Embassy officials, Gastonguay said. The U.S. State Department was not immediately available for comment.

SNIP

Hannah Gastonguay said her family was fed up with government control in the U.S. As Christians they don’t believe in “abortion, homosexuality, in the state-controlled church,” she said.

U.S. “churches aren’t their own,” Gastonguay said, suggesting that government regulation interfered with religious independence.

Among other differences, she said they had a problem with being “forced to pay these taxes that pay for abortions we don’t agree with.”

 Seriously, toss these people back in the Pacific Ocean. They're too stupid to be allowed to be U.S. citizens.

Or as Squatlo put it:

 I'm wondering if there might not be a silver lining to this misadventure, though.  What if we could convince more religious nutcases to abandon America in similar fashion?  I'm thinking of your Westboro Baptists right now, but don't want to limit the cruise line's passenger list to that one particular set of wingnuts and cranks.  

I believe we could actually get enough donations from the rest of us to purchase and outfit a fleet of sailboats for such an endeavor, and offer "free cruises" with God serving as navigator, if they'll just sign up and climb aboard.  We might even hold bon voyage parties at the pier as they drift away.

But someone really should warn Kiribati, just in case any of them actually make it to that atoll.  Cannibals don't deserve our religious loons...